I was having a lazy day in bed today after a hellish and freakish last 3 weeks at work where lay-offs, fuckery, and over all universal asshattishness has abounded. Lo and behold, one of my all-time favorite movies comes on.
Pretty in Pink starring Molly Ringwald.
Well, first, I LOVE me some Molly Ringwald but second, I LOVE me some John Hughes.
There I lay all spread out with a Diet Coke (yes, I’m back on them but that’s a whole other post) in my glorious day-offedness surrounded by dogs and a dreary rainy day. Molly timidly moved her way through the “richie” party and her love of the swoop-haired “Blaine” character (who, btw, isn’t as cute as I remember) while being the “poor” girl with the unique taste and love-forlorn “Duckie” to pine away for her at random intervals.
It occurred to me that the 80s (well hell, and the 90′s, 2000′s, and beyond) there lived a plethora of movies where the weird/awkward/not-traditionally-beautiful/poor girl would have a “makeover” of sorts and some guy would fall in love with her.
If the movie was super cliche? There would be a scene where she took off her nerdy glasses and let down her hair and suddenly a glamazon would emerge from the bowels of nerd-Hell. Or maybe that famous staircase scene where she descends slowly as the boy waits at the bottom and she is revealed step by step to be a wildly beautiful girl who has just been hidden all this time behind ugly clothes, bad hair, and glasses.
“Pretty in Pink” saw Molly Ringwald drawing an upside-down triangle dress on a scratch pad in anticipation for going to Prom and showing ole swoop-hair (that Blaine guy who stood her up because he was afraid of what his friends would think) just how awesome and hot she was. The dress came alive as Andie (Molly Ringwald) cuts up a couple of dresses that have been given to her by her Father and Bestie. The pink monster dress comes alive just in time for her to enter an old school hotel looking breathy and super pink.
And this is where the entire audience would go “Awwwwww” at how the poor girl put on the perfect dress and was transformed.
Thing is, I got really pissed off watching that movie – Maybe because I’m kinda tired of the whole “change your cover and people will like you” thing or maybe because the over-simplification is that we all need to be something that is acceptable to other people if we want to have it easier.
Take this journal, for instance. I write here because I want to mark my thought process through this journey and maybe make a little cash through my ads. I catch myself writing her more at times when I’m feeling really “on” and then I’ll go for a month or two while life gets crazy.
Something lately that has happened is a “Pretty in Pink” moment that I want to address here. People in this world are really mean. And sometimes those mean people are mentally ill and sometimes they are just really small, hateful, unkind people who hate themselves so they lash out at others to make themselves feel better. One of those haters found this blog and has targeted me for their “fun” by way of making fun of me and overall acting like an untamed zoo gorilla flinging doo doo all around.
If I were a coward, I might hide all of my posts or stop talking but I’ve never been that girl.
The “Pretty in Pink” moment comes when I tell everyone reading that I am not going to become Andie and make a new dress for myself in hopes of “catching the swoop-haired boy” or even, for that matter, showing someone how amazing I am. Truth is, I don’t need to have that kind of moment because I know exactly who I am and I know exactly what my value is. (dangling article!)
The world wants us to dress ourselves up every day to be more palatable. That goes for losing weight, being a different color, being taller, being richer, or even being smarter. And people want those things from others because they, themselves, are scared as fuck of people who are not exactly like them. They can’t process their own hate so they demand that we mold ourselves to them so that they don’t have to be challenged or unsure. Problem is, those people are never EVER going to be satisfied so why should we be anything but exactly who we are?
So, for those moments and people in this world who radiate their own damage out onto others rather than doing the internal work of learning to love yourself so that you can learn to love others: Fuck you AND your ugly pink dress.